Black Saturday, Easter, and the days following

Black Saturday -
A few weeks ago at the perinatal bereavement group, Sharon (the chaplain who faciltates the group), was telling us that as we look to Easter the events that took place then can be seen as similar to what we are going through now. The disciples were mourning on that day and were in a sort of in-between state; Jesus was crucified and died and hadn't raised from the dead yet. After Jesus died I can just imagine that amongst those who loved him--his mother, the eleven apostles, and the rest of His followers--there was much sadness, sorrow, and disappointment. However, that was not the end of the story. Praise God. They then experienced surprising joy when they found out that Jesus was resurrected and didn't stay dead. He was with them once again.
As parents who have lost their babies, we are in kind of in the same emotional state as the disciples as we are grieving the death of our babies. We are currently in a "Black Saturday" mode and we cry and we hurt...I feel a literal ache at times. However, we can have tremendous hope as we look to the day where we will be reunited with our sons or daughters in Heaven. What glorious promises! :)

Easter- in one word --> Healing.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but it was as if the resurrection of Jesus has taken on new meaning and I gained SO much encouragement as I revel in how He is alive and how He has made me eternally alive in Him. I can now appreciate the gift of Heaven because I have someone so very special there. And I just want to be with the Lord and behold Him in His splendor and beauty. Oh, that I would keep His sacrifice and the resurrection ever before me! After Easter happenings:

Disneyland -
It was so much fun to go with some family that are visiting from Davao. (I shouldn't have worked out my lower body at the gym that same morning, though. It took me three days to finally be able to walk up and down stairs without wincing!) I did, however, actually cry a little when I was in line for Small World because I knew I'd never get to take my daughter and sing this song (that they play at least 25 times during the ride!) with her.

Hanging out with friends from the bereavement group -
We were able to share a meal together, share photos and memories about our babies, play Taboo, and I was rolling on the floor as some of us shared a few of our most embarrassing moments. Crazy people--hilarious and real.

Spending time with some family -
It's been awesome having Ate Chel, Kuya Chito, Tiffany(6), and Ruthie(3), and Ate Pat around. I've been driving them around So Cal and seeing sights I haven't even been to (and I've lived here practically all my life!). I've been enjoying the conversation, the company, and the kids :)